We never had any kind of serious arguments. I was downright scared. I could barely feel my limbs as I slunk back down into my chair. I could feel my b...eathing quicken as I felt my now unfamiliar anxiety coming back to me.Looking into my dad's eyes, I attributed them to something I hadn't before: fear. It felt awful. Feeling like my parents weren't on my side was downright awful. I felt unsafe. Like my world became a lot less stable. Like the house was more unwelcoming.Dad studied my face for a. As I arrived it started to rain quiet heavily and I took shelter across from the toilets and waited for it to stop and when it did, I bolted across only to find the 'Ladies' was closed for repairs, and a sign telling me to ask at the 'Gent's' section, to use the cubical with the attendant standing guard.I went around only to find more frustration as the attendant was away, so I called in to see if anyone was there, there was not so I went in due to desperation and urgency.There was three. The whole family rushed inta the bedroom an' found her collapsed in her bed.Isaac wasn't breathin', an' he held an empty laudanum bottle in his hand. There wuz no question 'bout him bein' dead. He had killed himself by drinkin' nearly a whole bottle of laudanum. I wuz damned shore that he knew exactly what he wuz doin'. Several times in the past week, Isaac had said that he knew that he would never be able ta git around like he should, an' he didn't want ta be a burden on anybody. Oh, well, I. Sand filled an apparently ancient river bed behind me which continued for a few hundred yards before ending in another wall of sand. The rock walls were at least a hundred feet wide and the water itself occupied a scant 120 feet by 80 in an elliptical pattern.There were a few dozen palms and no wind to speak of in the depression. The girls ran to stake out areas and put their blankets down and ran to the water.Marcie came to me and said with a put on pout, "Shawn you should have told us about.
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